Ray DeForest: The Devil Wears Parka

By Ray DeForest, TTP: I remember it like it was yesterday. The fall leaves were crunchy and the wind was howling slightly. It was a Tuesday, October 31, 1967.  School was out and I was finally old enough to have a “real” Halloween costume from the 5 and Dime in Great Kills, the town I grew up in on Staten Island! My mom took me to Whitman’s, and I looked and marveled at the Ben Cooper Costumes in those really cool boxes with the cellophane windows that showed the mask hidden inside. I wanted to be a Devil. Mom said yes and I grabbed it quick before she could change her mind. When we got home I had to put it on right away. It was one of those fake satin one-piece jumpers with a printed design on the chest and ties in the back to fit all sizes. The mask was frightening. His face was red and he had horns. I couldn’t wait to scare everyone as I went house to house and gathered up my goodies in my papier-mâché pumpkin. My sister was old enough to wear the uniform of the grown up kids… the “Hobo” outfit. Black top hat, flannel shirt, baggy pants from my dad, oversized shoes and an old cigar. Then she burned a cork and rubbed the black all over her face. A pillowcase would be for the candy and the requisite sock full of chalk to fight the evil ones! Just as we were about to head out the door my mom decided it was way too cold out and made me put a coat on over my costume and a wool hat on my head. UGH! I was so upset. I argued with her, but as always she won. With my head hung low and frown on my face, I went out into the spooky cold night. This Devil Wears a Parka!!!!”

I still love to dress up in costumes. I have moved on a bit from the ones in the box, but nothing is more fun than stepping outside my “normal” self and being a Superhero, a sexy “lady” or anything else that fits my fancy! On occasion (ok more often than most) I love doing drag, and pounding the pavement in a 5 inch stiletto. Believe me when I tell you that it is a very brave thing to do, but so awesome! I always get a very interesting reaction when I go out in drag. Gay men mostly want to ignore me (how can you ignore a 7 foot tall drag queen?), and I think it has something to do with drag queens threatening many people’s sense of gender.  The funny, or rather surprising thing, is that straight men adore me! How could they not think those 36-inch long legs are sexy!

I was reading an article on cross-dressing and it spoke about the fact that most men who crossdress are actually more likely to be straight, with research studies putting the figure up to 80%!  Yes you read that right. It’s not gay men heading over to Victoria’s Secret to buy a sexy bra and panty set, it’s straight men who have a strong desire to wear feminine things. Why? No one really knows for sure, but many men will tell you it relaxes them or makes them feel better. And women do “it” to. It has long been acceptable in our society for women to wear trousers, shirts and other clothes traditionally associated with men. Then there are the “Drag Kings”, the female version of a “Drag Queen”. These are women that perform and look like men.

My life has always been pretty easy in the sense of gender identification. I never really doubted my “manhood”. I grew up in a great home with awesome parents and a pretty damn cool sister. Mom was a model, dad was a local sports hero and my sister was a successful record industry mover and shaker. When I came out it was pretty non eventful. The first time I dressed in drag it wasn’t that big a deal either. My friend dressed me up, told me I looked amazing and helped push me out the door. I’ve been addicted ever since! Don’t get me wrong, I was nervous as all hell! In fact, I still get nervous walking out the door in costume, but, at this point in my life I realize that we all wear “drag”. Every time we dress in that fab t-shirt and perfect jeans, and head out to a club, we are in drag. Shox or stilettos, it’s all drag people!

So as Halloween is upon us once again and I adjust my Batgirl mask, I take a deep breath and step out the door.  I strut my 5 inch stiletto boots down the pavement with my partner and friends at my side. The wind blows through my new wig and I think to myself… I bet mom would have told me to wear a hat!

Hugs and love [and Happy Halloween!]

Previously: Ray DeForest: Who I Am | Ray DeForest: Remembrall | Ray DeForest: Those Wonderful Toys | Ray DeForest: Date Night